I'm like a pencil;
sometimes sharp,
most days
well-rounded,
other times
dull or
occasionally
broken.
Still I write.
j.g. lewis
is a writer/photographer in Toronto.
Month: March 2018
by Deb Stidham Avery
My dear, you are a most brave, kind and awesome being.
When your mother threw away the little bunch of wildflowers you picked for her, stating that they were only weeds, it was only because she failed to see their worth.
When others laughed at you, and still do, for your deep love of all beings, it was because they were not capable of seeing the beauty and intelligence in all things.
When your husband belittled and controlled it was because he did not appreciate your true worth, the intricacies of your beautiful mind, or the beauty and depth of your heart.
It’s never about you, my dear. It’s always been about them.
Each time someone says or does something hurtful, remember that.
It is not about you, your intelligence, your worth and your compassionate heart. Instead, it is always about them.
It’s about all the times they were hurt, ridiculed or neglected. It’s about all the past hurts in their lives that caused them to close their hearts and minds. It’s not about you and your openness, your deep empathy and your ability to see all sides of the situation.
Instead of armoring your heart and mind, you chose to open them to the pain and heartaches and the interconnectedness of all that is around you. That, my dear, takes courage, trust, and lots of love and compassion.
Don’t you dare let the words, thoughts and actions of others cause you a moment’s pain. You know better than this. You’ve spent your whole life learning that we all travel through life with different levels of consciousness. And you know that this is just how life works.
It has nothing to do with you, my dear, and everything to do with them; their perceptions and the experiences that have shaped their lives.
Love and forgive them because of what you have learned. They have traveled a different pathway. They have experienced life differently from you.
Now, dry your tears and always remember these two things.
You are a beautiful, intelligent and loving being.
And it’s never about you, dear heart, and always about them.
©2018 Deb Stidham Avery
Deb Stidham Avery lives in a small rural community in the South with her best friend Sam, the dog. She is often found walking in the woodlands, gardening, reading, listening to music and writing. It has been through her writing that she has found healing, hope and grace. She hopes that by sharing her experiences and insights with others, in hopes that they too may find peace, acceptance and help in dealing with the problems and traumas that life can sometimes deal us all. She currently writes for The Tattooed Buddha and has written for Sivana, Wake Magazine and elephant journal.
You write about your loneliness, and how you miss your family far away.
You write about a certain isolation we all can feel at certain times.
Distance is so hard, and many times it prevents us from showing how we truly care.
Distance takes time, and it takes up your mind.
It takes an effort to remain connected with those in other cities, countries, or times zones.
It takes effort to spell out how you are feeling.
I find writing a letter, regularly, is one way to express and explore thoughts for someone else. I firmly believe a handwritten letter says what other communication styles simply cannot.
I send letters when I need to, or when I believe someone else could use a pick-me-up. I know it is appreciated. I read about it in my return mail.
Of course I would prefer a face-to-face visit, but I feel each letter I send carries a message for someone I care about.
Sit down and write a letter. Take the time to share your wisdom, your wit, and your wishes.
Find your words for someone else.
Write on.
03/12/2018 j.g.l
You do have a choice in what you can do for yourself and with yourself.
How you treat yourself is often how you treat others.
Are you generous and kind in your actions and intent?
Are you doubtful or deceitful in the messages you send?
What do you tell yourself when nobody is listening?
Do you listen?
Be yourself.
See yourself.
03/11/2018 j.g.l.
